40+ Hilarious Fish Jokes And Puns That Are Off The Scale

child with fish jokes
Share
Tweet

When it comes to telling jokes, there's no better way for kids to spread the cheer and have a giggle than to learn some new ones to share with the rest of the family.

With World Ocean Day just behind us, it's the perfect time to update your marine-life humour. So, stop clown(fish)ing around and check out our favourite fish-related jokes - you'll be sure to have the laughter coming in waves!

Inspiration straight to your inbox, every week

Fish Jokes For Kids

1) What did the shark say after eating a clownfish? That tasted a little bit funny!

2) What type of music should you listen to whilst fishing? Something catchy.

3) Why do fish swim in schools? Because they can't walk.

4) How do you talk to a fish? You drop it a line!

5) What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.

6) What's the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano but you can't tuna fish!

7) Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because they have their own scales.

8) What kind of fish only comes out at night? A starfish.

9) Where do fish go to borrow money? A loan-shark.

10) What do fish take to stay healthy? Vitamin Sea.

11) What did one fish say to the other? Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught!

12) What do you call a fish with lots of money? A goldfish.

13) Why don't fish like basketball? Because they're afraid of the net!

14) How do shellfish get to the hospital? In a clambulance.

15) What do whales have for dinner? They eat fish and ships!

Funny Fish One-Liners

16) Two fish are in a tank, one turns to the other and says "How do you drive this thing?"

17) Yesterday I had a cup of coffee with a penguin. He said he would have preferred a fish.

18) There was a sale today at the fish market, so I went to see what the catch was.

19) Two fish swam into a concrete wall, one turns to the other and says "Dam!"

20) There was a massive fight today at the fish restaurant. One fish got battered!

Knock Knock Jokes

21) Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Fish.

Fish who?

Bless you!

22) Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Fish.

Fish who?

Fish-ious temper you have there, you need to calm down!

23) Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Artie Fish.

Artie Fish who?

Artie Fish-el Intelligence.

24) Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Fish.

Fish who?

Fish you a Merry Christmas, we fish you a Merry Christmas!

Fish Puns

25) If you can think of a better fish pun, let minnow...

26) Well, salmon had to say it.

27) You're so so-fish-ticated!

28) That was a terrible joke, I’d make him walk the plankton for that!

29) I'm feeling fin-tastic today.

30) Have you thought of a fish pun yet or do you need some more time to mullet over?

31) That's enough fish puns for today, I think we should scale back.

32) Did you hear that the pearl thief is still at large? Some are calling it a clamity!

Funny Fishing Jokes

33) What do you get if you cross a fishing rod with a P.E sock? A hook, line and stinker!

34) What is the most famous fish you can catch? A starfish!

35) What is the most valuable fish you can catch? A goldfish

36) Where does a fish keep its money? A riverbank!

37) What kind of music should you listen to while fishing? Something with a good tune-a!

Hilarious Seafood Jokes


38) Why did the crab keep all the food to themselves? Because it was a shellfish!

39) What would you have if you crossed an owl with an oyster? An animal that gives you pearls of wisdom!

40) What did a shark eat with it's peanut butter sandwich? A jellyfish.

41) How did the oyster manage to hide from the fish? Clamouflage!

Disclaimer

Disclaimer

At Kidadl we pride ourselves on offering families original ideas to make the most of time spent together at home or out and about, wherever you are in the world. We strive to recommend the very best things, that are suggested by our community and are things we would do ourselves - our aim is to be the trusted friend to parents. 

We try our very best, but cannot guarantee perfection. We will always aim to give you accurate information at the date of publication - however, information does change, so it's important you do your own research, double-check and make the decision that is right for your family.  

Kidadl provides inspiration for everything from family days out to online classes, arts, crafts and science experiments. We recognise that not all activities and ideas are appropriate and suitable for all children and families or in all circumstances. Our recommended activities are based on age but these are a guide. We recommend that these ideas are used as inspiration, that ideas are undertaken with appropriate adult supervision, and that each adult uses their own discretion and knowledge of their children to consider the safety and suitability.

Kidadl cannot accept liability for the execution of these ideas, and parental supervision is advised at all times, as safety is paramount. Anyone using the information provided by Kidadl does so at their own risk and we can not accept liability if things go wrong. 

We also link to other websites, but are not responsible for their content.